Thursday, August 31
Shit, I believe this is called infatuation. This is also such a very 'expected the unexpected' thing. I shall adopt it as my maxim from now on. Omfg! I feel retarded! I feel embarrassed even! See? I'm even hyperventilating, so to speak. Like really, I never ever ever expected this. Like really, I never ever ever believed that there were much better fish in the ocean. I don't wanna get burnt, though.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
5:00 PM
Do you believe in fate? Yeah, I do.
:] :] :]
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
2:30 AM
Wednesday, August 30
Living in the sports block has superior advantages. Like during IBG season; no one starts begging you to join handball/soccer/basketball/road relay/ hockey cos they need x number of people to form a team. Because along every 2-metre interval along the corridor, there's bound to be somebody who would do it. Lol. My friendly neighbors have also come to accept that Amanda is impaired in the physical fitness and agility department.
On joining court games:
Amanda: Can't lah. I can't play ball games!
Head popping out from next door: Ya lor, I also think you got no stamina; must every now and then call time-out for smoke break.
On joining road relay:
Amanda: Look at me! Do I look like I can run?
Lorrie: Hahahaha. This one ah, must wait for the wind to blow in the correct direction!!!
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
3:22 PM
Tuesday, August 29
I don't know if it is directly linked to my newly-acquired single status, but my Friendster account is now a hive of activity with remote acquaintances and long-lost (but well-meaning) friends alike messaging me. That also means I have record highs on Number of Profile Views now. Nothing a little ego boost wouldn't hurt? Hah :P
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
10:36 AM
Monday, August 28
Everybody's emo these days. I love you, Sweet Lynn. Lol. Goodnight!
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
3:58 AM
Sometimes I feel foolish for proclaiming that I live for love. What is a good head on your shoulders and 15 years of education steeped in pragmatism and results, when you reject common sense in the name of a non-tangible. When you naively insist that nothing much matters as long as you love and are loved in return. While my belief has been bitterly attacked of late, I think I will stubbornly hold fast to it as the core of my soul and the root of my strength. For what really is life, if you cannot multiply its joys and sorrows ten-fold through those around you. Love is an exploding cigar I willingly smoke; I willingly love and give - and just as greedily, demand and take. I still feel foolish about it, but I won't fight against my heart.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
3:55 AM
Saturday, August 26
A torturous night, without fans. Because there was a power trip along A3. And so I drew up the blinds, and left my door open. And nearly got eaten up ten million mozzies that probably originate from the big scary tree next to me. So what - if I went to bed at 2am hoping to look presentable for the photoshoot? I woke up at 5am, and came down with a fever. And lost out on my pay-cheque in the process. BOO HOO HOO! It was supposed to pay off my ticket to Bangkok! Staying in school now for the NESGO meeting; Mr Tushie'd better get his ass on board!
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
8:41 AM
This week,
Sashimi, check.
Char siew sou, check.
Mexican cuisine, check.
Taiwanese porridge, check.
A coffee a day - at least, check.
A pack of cigarettes a day, check.
I'm eating too well, and living too self-destructively.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
1:16 AM
Friday, August 25
Liwern and I are damn high now! Because we finished the whole bottle of tokaji. Lol.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
2:17 AM
Thursday, August 24
Hee, sorry guys. I'm super spamming my own blog. But that's what you get when different people send you different pictures at different times! Sorrreeeeeeeyyyy. Very, very, very sorrreeeeeyy..!!
Oh, and I almost forgot.
I AM GOING BANGKOK THIS MID-TERM BREAK!
Yayyy!! With Lynn, Isaac and Liwern.
Lol, Mr. Tung - I will so see you in a month's time! My skin is just itching to be inked again!
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
1:19 AM
Wednesday, August 23
It's a very irrational fear I have; of stepping into Bizad. I don't want to see him, I don't want to see his friends. I have no one to eat lunch with, and I know a total of zero people in business. Maybe I know a few - here, and there - but I cannot possibly desperately seek them out and expect them to take me in under their wings. I FEEL SO GODDAMN LAME! Rarrr! I think I'll even worse if I know he's reading this. My pride factor will how shoot down to ground zero. Lol.
Anyhow, life is picking up. I had a good day at school today :] And I have friends. Yes, they're all around school. You just need to get out more, remember that Amanda! And I received another rose on my doorstep today :] I think it's Lynn. Thank you dear! She is very full of
ren. I learnt that today in my lecture on Confucianism.
And now, the next hurdle. A 3-hour class with him tomorrow. There is this watch ad with the tagline, 'What should I be in the next 24 hours?' - complete with a pensive lady adorned with an expensive watch. That is so me. (Sans the watch.) What should I be? The same ol' normal me. Or the angsted-up-just-been-dumped me. Or the I-don't-give-a-shit-about-anything-cos-I'm-way-stronger-than-that me.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
3:40 PM
Sorry for spamming my own face shamelessly. Lol, but I really like this picture by Chris! It almost makes me feel peaceful; either that or I've gone completely insane. Thank you Cheryl for calling me today :] Thank you Lynn for introducing fried chicken in shrimp paste to me :] Xo. Love you, girls.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
2:28 AM
Tuesday, August 22
This set is significantly less "porn-ish", in the words of wise ol' Deb. Lol.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
3:03 AM
Monday, August 21
It was surreal; almost easy. Until he hugged me goodbye.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
11:00 PM
For you to have a good laugh over, not for you to judge.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:52 PM
Oh, so fun. I hunted down my first picture already.
My mom will tell me I'm slouching.
Me and Cheryl are still obsessing about our noses.
We are so embracing fake, plastic beauty when we have money!
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
3:31 AM
I'm the biggest, fattest, most hopeless, most foolish loser on Earth. But since we still love each other, we are now working towards - not a grand passionate affair - but a 'peaceful and amicable' one. Lol. Oh, screw the vindictive karma circles haunting us. We'll see how this goes. See, I already said I was a big-time loser.
Anyhow, on the photoshoot today: tiring and hot. At one point in time, I stepped into an ant nest and only realized they were swarming all over my feet when a helpful photographer pointed it out. Them ants were probably interfering with his picture composition. Also, I banged my head against a spiky leaf. Also - random Ang Moh tourists, sarong fraternities of Indian men and stray Malay kids were swarming around us. One of the Indian men actually thanked me for a picture of me that he managed to snap on the sly; he says he's sending it back to India. Yay! I'm going to be famous in India!! Last, Peter showed me a nice picture he shot of me. I like it! :] :] :] How come I didn't look so nice in my pageant photoshoot huh? Lol.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
2:29 AM
Sunday, August 20
Blasts of shit from the past.
2 year's ago on the 20th of August, I "met a guy :) who's tall and has gorgeous slitty eyes. and makes my heart race that little bit more. and that is worth blogging it down for posterity :)" at a lecture.
The next day was all family and celebrating singlehood - "we went to eat at lingzhi vegetarian again. hehe food's nothing to shout about. what's worth shouting about is that i went wakeboarding today! and managed to stand! and yell. and fall. with my mouth still open. after several litres of salt water, a few hours of fantastic fun, i went home warm and snug to my family. who says you need a boyfriend to enjoy saturdays?"
This year's no different; I am alone, but this time being a complete loser. I am actually waiting for him to call or text me, because I know the 40-hour case competition is over. I am actually contemplating forgiving and forgetting, because I had once misdemeanored in the same fashion, and maybe its just karma making its rounds.
That fateful 21st of August, he decided to drop by my place because he was in the area and things just whirlpooled into a grand story. Tomorrow's my mother's birthday; what else is going to happen?
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:54 PM
I bought a dress today that is m-a-g-i-c. I'm really into dresses these days and I've been finding the most incredulous steals at the oddest shops, but they're all vintage and semi-boho, which can otherwise be interpreted as frumpy, in a sense. But this dress. This dress makes me feel sexy! :] Apart from that, I met Austen to finally collect my ice-cream treat! :] And [in:fatuation] was a roaring success; tickets were sold out! I also made some new business friends, to add to my meagre collection! Lol. Then went off for midnight chicken rice, which I will so regret tomorrow at the photoshoot, I just know it. On the cab back, me and the two Shawns sat in the best taxi in Singapore, or say the cab-driver says. Why? Because he had a karaoke system, and because he can sing in 8 different languages, and because he has been featured on CNN and BCC and local TV, and because he makes his 'clients' endure a programme featuring all the different news coverage on him (BBC's version is the best). And we had to sit through his singing too.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
2:29 AM
Friday, August 18
I feel like eating McD's twister fries. And Crystal Jade's char siew sous. And Bread Talk's spicy floss buns. And anything more substantial than Coffee Club's wasabi prawn salad. I think Kairuo was getting semi grossed out from watching me suck salad dressing off roasted potatoes. But I need to control otherwise I will look hideous on Sunday. After the photoshoot, I shall eat much much. Only 2 more days.Yay! Until then, fags. Sigh.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
6:35 PM
What a day to take my mind off things. Met Van for dessert, walked around a lot, tried to retail-therapy my woes away, had dinner with a bunch of Italians... But at the end of the day, as I return to my room, the thoughts come flooding back. I really really loved you and trusted you and believed you, no matter the troubles we had. I absolutely cannot believe you would do such a thing to me. I think I am devastated. And you are nonchalant. I love, or loved, you so much - it's hard for me to say goodbye forever. But no other options lie in sight. How could you let another girl kiss you!?
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:33 AM
Thursday, August 17
Fucking played. That's how I feel. And I had to find out a year later. If I had known then, I would never have gotten back together with you. You lied to me over and over again, because I asked, and you always threw me that cocky smug look, coupled with a "Darl...don't be silly." So was I silly to ask if you and Chrystal ever had something on? So was I silly to ask if you ever did anything with Daphne? The only silly thing I did, was actually thinking that I was silly - and that you would never do that to me. Scum of the Earth. Fuck off.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
4:01 AM
Wednesday, August 16
Dear Alan's going off to Wisconsin and so what was initially planned to be a quiet farewell dinner party of 3 got expanded into a boisterous catastrophe of 6 persons: Alan, Becky, Liwern, Isaac, Fad and me! But...I like! Good food is meant to be shared with great company!! :] First Thai and Loof and gorgeous martinis and good friends; youth is not wasted on us :] :] :]
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
1:59 AM
Tuesday, August 15
I don't think I've ever had such a problematic relationship with one man. Out of 2 years, we've spent a good year quarelling. Yet amidst all the fighting, we've also had the most incredible moments. We're both so stubborn and proud, it's hard to get past the fragile egos and the hurtful comments that come along so easily. We're so different, yet so alike; so tormented by our fears of losing each other, yet struggling so hard just to resolve the differences. I don't like this. It makes me unhappy most of the time, but the thought of an even greater misery without him is more overwhelming. Why, why. It shouldn't have to be this difficult. It should be just beds and beds of red roses.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
3:17 AM
Monday, August 14
A Picture Is Worth a Thousand Words?
So the Material Girl herself, in an H&M ad, is now plastered on the scaffolding on the Duomo in Milan, courting lots and lots of controversy given that she isn't exactly the most moral of persons to be fronting the age-old cathedral. But what a lot of insights this one picture throws up!
It's still summer, alright. Check out the blue, blue skies. I bet the pigeons are frying up on the piazza already.
The Duomo is still under construction. Ohmygeesus; when is it ever going to be completed?
It's always fashion over religion for the Milanese.
H&M must be doing really, really well. They've gotten Gisele in the past to front their ads, and now they have Madonna. Not bad for something that trawls out runway copies, season after season. I heart H&M!
A google run-through reveals that H&M stands for Hennes & Mauritz. That's trivia for you! They're from Sweden too, by the way - it's like the apparel version of Ikea.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
4:45 PM
My First Day of School
In Primary 1, it would gone something like this: "I woke up at 8am, had a healthy breakfast prepared lovingly by Mommy, then watched TV until it was time to put on my uniform and tie. I caught the school bus and off I went to school where I made many new friends and got my first homework assignment, a mini composition entitled "My First Day of School".
Now in uni, it's more like this: "I woke up at 12noon and had my requisite morning coffee and fag. I spent half an hour artfully making up my face to conceal the humongous eyebags I had, and off I went zooming away on Lynn's bike to The Deck where I watched her eat oily and extremely unhealthy Fish and Chips. By the time, we were done, we were already late for class at NUH. It didn't help that even when we reached, we had to get lost, walk aound the whole goddamn hospital for 20 minutes, hunting down appropriate elevators that would take us up to the O & G Conference Room... only to discover that - there wasn't class! In fact, class only commences on the 4th of September! Yayyyy.. We then decided to head down to Central Forum, hoping to catch the Milo van, but alas we were too late. Instead we had yoghurt and while waiting for the Aunty to churn the ingredients together, Austen so helpfully pointed out to the crowd that there was a pretty lady at the yoghurt stall. How honey-tongued; I fluffed my hair up coyly and discovered that there was engine grease on my hair, from Lynn's helmet. I spent the next 15 minutes trying to dodge anyone whom I might possibly know, because I didn't want to start my semester being known as The Girl With Extremely Oily Hair."
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
3:40 PM
Omg. I think I am having an academic orgasm.
**
Part I. Confucianism and Competing Modes of Thought in Early China
1. Introduction and a brief history of early China
Patricia Buckley Ebrey, Cambridge Illustrated History of China, pp. 10-85.
2. Confucius
Wing-tsit Chan, A Source Book in Chinese Philosophy, pp. 14-48.
3. Moists and Mencius
Chan, A Source Book in Chinese Philosophy, pp. 211-231; 49-83.
4. Lao Tzu, Chuang Tzu and Logicians
Chan, A Source Book, pp. 136-210, 232-243
5. Hsun Tzu, Legalists, "Doctrines of Yin and Yang and the Five Agents"
Chan, A Source Book, pp. 115-135, 251-261; 244-250.
6. Tung Chung-shu and Han Imperial Confucianism
Chan, A Source Book, pp. 271-88.
Part II. Cultural Topics in Traditional China
7. The Chinese Idea on Race
Marc Samuel Abramson, "Deep eyes and high noses: Physiognomy and the depiction of babarians in Tang China", in Nicola di Cosmo and Don J; Wyatt eds., Political Frontiers, Ethnic Boundaries and Human Geographies in Chinese History, pp.119-159; Anne Birrell trs., The Classic of Mountains and Seas, "Introduction" (pp.xiii-xlvi).
8. The Chinese Cities and Urban Culture
Xu Yinong, The Chinese City in Space and Time: The Development of Urban Form in Suzhou, pp.166-199; Antonia Finnane, Speaking of Yangzhou : A Chinese city, 1550-1850, pp.43-68.
9. The Chinese Kinship
Patricia Ebrey, "The early stages in the development of descent group organization", in Patricia Buckley Ebrey and James L. Watson eds., Kinship Organization in Late Imperial China, 1000-1940, pp.16-61; Robert Hymes, "Marriage, descent groups, and the localist strategy in Sung and Yuan Fuzhou", in Kinship Organization in Late Imperial China, 1000-1940, pp.95-136.
10. The Chinese Religious Pilgrimage
Susan Naquin and Yu Chun-fang, "Pilgrimage in China", in Susan Naquin and Yu Chun-fang eds., Pilgrims and Sacred Sites in China, pp.1-39; Yu Chun-fang, "P’u-t’o shan: Pilgrimage and the creation of the Chinese Potalaka", in Pilgrims and Sacred Sites in China, pp.192-245.
11. The Chinese Women
Bettine Birge, Women, Property, and Confucian Reaction in Sung and Yüan China (960-1368), pp.283-296; Dorothy Ko, Every Step a Lotus : Shoes for Bound Feet, pp.47-76; Patricia Buckley Ebrey, The Inner Quarters: Marriage and the Lives of Chinese Women in the Sung Period, pp.152-203, 250-271.
12. The Chinese Merchants
Billy K.L. So, Prosperity, Region, and Institutions in Maritime China: The South Fukien Pattern, 946-1368, pp.205-279; Timothy Brook, The Confusions of Pleasure: Commerce and Culture in Ming China, pp.87-138.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
2:30 AM
This is before Amanda lapsed into an incredible 16-hour sleep, interspersed by great feasting sessions at home.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:04 AM
Saturday, August 12
2 weeks of intensive dance and it ends off with a new-found set of muscles plus a smashing performance that was most unfortunate not to win. Of course, it may (or, is definitely) just be my own non-objectivity. Lol! My stunts were fine, and I didn't commit any heinous errors. Yay! Lynn was there to watch me; and that's about it. A bit sad; Zh wasn't around, Liwern played mahjong until she overslept, Deb left for Mexico. Hah, it would have been much better if I had someone in the audience rooting for me, I guess.
Nonetheless, random people from here and there have smiled at me and told me my costume looks fabulous, and that the dance was great and yada yada. Nothing a little ego boost would hurt, given that I haven't slept for more 36 hours and was bruised beyond imagination from the shoulder pads of my Sailormoon outfit. Forza Eusoff!
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
3:11 PM
Friday, August 11
So I conclude that stunting and smiling is mutually dependent. When Rui Sheng and I finally got it right, I think we were smiling like kukubirds. Rag is tomorrow morning, and after that I'm going to crash out for a while and then meet all the people that I haven't met due to the very unforgiving time spent on dance practices.
Saturday! Eusoff Bash and/or supper with Zh. Sunday! 4/12 class reunion at Crystal Jade! Monday! (Er, rest?) Tuesday! Dinner with Alan, Becky, Liwern and Isaac! Wednesday! Mambo with Jiaying and Jingyi! Thursday! Dinner with Van! Friday! Meet Miss Kairuo! Saturday! Bizad Bash!
At this point, I must make a public service announcement. There is going to be a fantastic bash this saturday, the 19th at MOS. Business pageant preview (aka lots and lots of hot chicks), Adidas fashion show, hip hop dance performances and freebies!!! Details are [
here]! I'm going to be there, and I don't care; if you're my friend, you're coming too!
Anyhow, this year bidding went very well. None of the frustrations as compared to previous semesters. This is what I'm taking: Management Science, Human Resource Management, Investment Analysis, Reproductive Health (haha, yes I know - wtf right?) and Chinese Tradition (for my China Studies Minor!!! Yayy.. one chingchiong Amanda comin' right up).
All's swell. 'Part from my love life, I guess. Haha. Expect the unexpected.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
4:32 PM
Am so very, very tired. Neck hurts, shoulders ache, arms sore, thighs immobilized, ass numbed. Fatigue vs. the need to flip. Stunts flop miserably, panic sets in. Flip, flip, flip. I can almost hear both of us praying. Smile, smile, smile! Smile for the audience!
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:36 AM
Thursday, August 10
I have discovered something really odd. There's a certain [
blog] floating somewhere out there, which has ripped my blog template off wholesale. Well, I sorta did create this template by myself, painstakingly editing the flowers, and re-arranging quotes and all that jazz - and I do have a (justified) sense of ownership over it. As if that is not strange enough, this particular person has ripped off my identity too; she took one of my posts (the Happy Birthday Singapore one) and simply changed my favorite food places to
her favorite food places. And she also changed my photos in the Lady section, to hers! I wish I was kindlier and less inclined towards taking offence, but I'm sorry! I'm protective over my property! The way I get annoyed when people pass off pictures I took as theirs, without asking me for permission first! :[
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
3:43 AM
Whilst I still love him, all it takes is more vacillation on his part and I think my limits will be reached. There's only so much waiting and so much hoping that one can do. Patience is a particularly strong suit of mine, but I think I far more demand a certain level of self-respect. Making that phonecall was terribly un-Amanda, but it was something straight from my heart. Pandering to indecision, however, takes a lot more convincing sometimes. It's not always about him, or me - it is the sum total that must be taken into consideration. Perhaps as I cease to be special in his eyes, it is time to bid farewell and bow out with grace.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
3:25 AM
Wednesday, August 9
Happy Birthday, Singapore.
I love you more than ever now, after trawling through a big part of continental Europe and getting frozen over in winter and then being all upset over the meagre ethnic culinary offerings. I love your mee kuah at Newton, your dim sum at Geylang, your thai food at Purvis Street, your sushi at Wasabi Tei. In fact, I also fell in love with your crabs at Alexandra Village - and I haven't even tried it. I also love the way every stranger is addressed by Uncle, or Aunty. And I love how my friends and family are all on this one little not-so-island-ish island. I love even the weather - sometimes. The only thing I don't love now, is your anti-smoking stand; ditch it and I'll heart you deep deep.
Meanwhile, updates! :]
Monday afternoon, Lynn surprised me with a flower at my doorstep. Well, the flower and vase was at the doorstep la, not Lynn. I love you, Lynnnnn! Mending a broken heart is 100000x easier with a nice pink flower in front of you all the time. Monday night, Liwern and I spent 3 hours wandering about my tiny little 3x3 metre room, looking for something to light up my cigarette. It was thunderstorming and I was absolutely dying for a smoke, while she was on the brink of starvation. After a while, the rain stopped and we ran out to Fong Seng, together with a good dozen people waiting down at A1. Me think the rain makes people hungry and indeed I had my 2nd best bowl of mee kuah in a week. Slurp.
Yesterday, we went tanning and we met this Danish dude with the most gorgeous tattoos ever. Maori influenced bands of ink, so reminiscent of Beckham and/or Angelina Jolie. He told us he got it at Bukit Tinggi, in Sumatra - and THAT. WILL. BE. MY. NEXT. DESTINATION. Whee! This guy sounds exactly like Tung, my Zen Master of Tattoos already! All free-style and relak-jack and Creator of "Moving!! Alive!" Tattoos!! :] :]
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
11:33 AM
Monday, August 7
I am so shameless. I believe I just spent the last couple of hours trying to flirt, captivate, charm and worm my way back into his good books. I just don't want to lose him like that, with a few carelessly-tossed words and an ultimatum. And I think it's working! :] Else, c'est la vie. There is no time for bitterness and tears this time round. It's only forward, and forward.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
4:05 AM
Sunday, August 6
The One That Got Away.
It took so much to tell him I was afraid of losing him. But that was Friday, and today is Sunday. And today, I let him get away. And got away he did.
amanda says: what if he was the one for me.*debz* says: well if he was...then you would still be together. but you're not, so he's not.
amanda says: how uuu knooowwww!!!!!*debz* says: because...we'll all end up with the one that was meant for us right? so how could we miss the one who was meant for us? then that would just disrupt everythin...cos if he was meant for you, then the girl he ends up with was meant for someone else and so on, so it doesnt make sense.
**I could take a fatalistic approach to it and just walk away with my head held high, keeping the good memories close to my heart. But it somehow stings, that it hasn't even been a few weeks since we just got back from Hong Kong, which isn't that distant a memory; a collection of sticky nights and gentle loving on the Fragrant Harbour. Too bad, Amanda. Wake up.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
9:37 PM
He broke up with me.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
8:42 PM
The Yellow-Box Rule is just stupid beyond justification. It is so annoying that I have found myself in ludicrous situations. Like trawling up and down Holland Village with Liwern, just looking for something, anything really, with smoking facilities. Like being forced to stand out on the pavements at Fong Seng, yelling to my friends over the heads of other seated patrons, just because the pavement is the designated smoking area.
I don't understand the logic. Smoke particles are mobile, no? If I remember correctly, they even move randomly according to some Brownian Motion Theory. So no, I don't think they will hover above the pavement only. Sigh. Just the other day, Zh mentioned that perhaps he would quit just so he doesn't have to live with the frustration of not having enough yellow boxes around. I say, wait til enough smokers have quit - and the Government stops earning tax revenue from fags - then, they might lift the ban. Hah.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
3:29 AM
Saturday, August 5
Ethnic woven cloth, Hanoi. Audrey Hepburn print, Venice Beach. Dried bouquet, Zh. Jewelry stand, Jiaying in Bangkok. La Scala program sheet, Milan. Traditional witch doll, Slovakia.
Car plate, Tachilek. Assorted postcards, everywhere. Travel; hoard and whore. Lol.
My room is looking rather dismal. I'm only vaguely satisfied with my notice-board. I have no speakers, no refrigerator (yet), no printer, no dustbin, no laundry basket, no ashtray, no comforter, and no funky sofas or cushions or bedsheets. I have a couple of nice things I picked up from my travels, but I remain uninspired as to how to put it all together. Poster-arrangement ideas and room-warming contributions are greatly appreciated! Thank you very much!
I'm actually heading down to Ikea later. Actually, now. But Lynn is still in La La Land. And that is after I called her to wake her up. Haha, let sleeping dogs shagged from Kewoc lie, I say.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
5:02 PM
Friday, August 4
What's in a name? That which we call a rose
By any other word would smell as sweet.
Romeo and Juliet (II, ii, 1-2)
What's in a break-up? That which we call a cooling-off
Or a 'let's-take-a-break', or a semi-break, or a 'lets-review-this-in-one-week'
By any other words would smell as bitter.
Drama-Mama Chronicles of Amanda
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
2:32 PM
Thursday, August 3
What the extraordinary 2 days. And what the extraordinary meltdown. Incessant ebbs of contemplation; worries and paranoia about my life, my future, my self-worth. My relationship with Zh. I hid at the smoking corner and cried while puffing lamely at a soggy cigarette. And of course, ruined my makeup.
So I went shopping. (Retail therapy, I call it.) The irony didn't escape me; I was sobbing to Kenneth about how everyone was suited up and looking smart and savvy and business-y while I looked like a bimbo who just got back from shopping. And after the meltdown, what do I do? - Yes, shopping. Sigh. Anyhow though, thank you dear Guardian Devil for your pep talk.
And Deb who came down to meet me for lunch and coffee. Lunch was great; coffee was weird. I ordered a Toasted Hazelnut Latte, and it was really toasted, a.k.a burnt. It even smelt burnt. I asked for a replacement, and got an Azuki Latte. Ever tried coffee with red beans? That's what my exotic drink essentially was. Myself, I think I will stick to regular latte at Starbucks.
And that's it. I'm too tired to elaborate; my brain is brain-fucking me big time.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
8:03 PM
Tuesday, August 1
Lynn Chan turns 22 today!
Since we have no nice pictures together (many many sighs), I virtually glued two pictures together to form a prettay, prettay Happy Birthday photo just for you (and my blog)! Of course, keeping in tradition with your penchance for putting sai pictures of me on your blog i.e., I look like sai here, while you look how cool! Haha. Muacks!!! Xoxoxoxoxo.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:51 PM
Anyhow, life is picking up. I had a good day at school today :] And I have friends. Yes, they're all around school. You just need to get out more, remember that Amanda! And I received another rose on my doorstep today :] I think it's Lynn. Thank you dear! She is very full of ren. I learnt that today in my lecture on Confucianism.
Sorry for spamming my own face shamelessly. Lol, but I really like this picture by Chris! It almost makes me feel peaceful; either that or I've gone completely insane. Thank you Cheryl for calling me today :] Thank you Lynn for introducing fried chicken in shrimp paste to me :] Xo. Love you, girls.
Ethnic woven cloth, Hanoi. Audrey Hepburn print, Venice Beach. Dried bouquet, Zh. 
