Sunday, July 31
liberty! equality! fraternity! hoho. happy national day preview, singapore.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:48 AM
they used really long wide screens to create that kind of waterscreen effect around the padang and i thought it was fantastic. 5 or 6 screen would then conspire to bring to life, singapore in colour. amazing stuff.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:44 AM
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:42 AM
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:36 AM
the red lions going all twirly in the sky.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:31 AM
after the torrential showers this morning, eusoff felt like it was in a giant airconditioned bubble and fongseng was awash in pretty pink flowers that got pummelled off the trees.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:24 AM
miss lollipop all decked out in tones of red, magenta and white ($0.50 from topshop). picture shot on location at eusoff.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:22 AM
Friday, July 29
methink i was a bore last night. a touchy word.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
8:56 AM
Thursday, July 28
damn tired. 4 days of eyeballing freshies is taking its toll. first, im sick of looking at people. everyone looks the same after a while. eyes, ears, nose, mouth all merge into a meaningless mess and we're left with nothing much to do except people-watch all day long. a hilarious side effect of all this visual activity is that when im out in town now, i scrutinize everyone i look in the most unsubtle manner. i will tiptoe and crane my neck just to look at someone in a better angle. so much so that nerf overheard a girl complain about me 'eyeballing her'. ohwellll. i thought she was hot what. haha. going for dinner with zh in a few hours time. i havent seen him all week. siigh. ohwells. its going to be such a celebratory dinner. first he got that 2nd position in the competition, and this morning he passed his bike test. one thing about zh, is when he puts his mind to a task, its always beautifully done. i hope it will revive my flagging spirit. went zouk last night again, (to prove to myself that im not boring?) and to meet liwern's boy and to go see pak who was awfully high on longisland tea when i met him.
dead beat.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
7:19 PM
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
7:17 PM
Tuesday, July 26
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
10:55 PM
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
10:55 PM
staying in school, being away from him, being caught up in face spotting, going for dinners with the rest, meeting new people, not having my handphone with me, being perfunctory in our conversations, its easy to feel distanced.
congratulations on getting 2nd for the competition. im really happy for ya..
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
9:43 PM
Monday, July 25
can you believe the airconditioners at the matric fair were faulty? can you believe we all spent one bloody morning and afternoon trying desperately to remain warm (ohyeahh. warm) and approachable despite sweating like pigs?
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
10:49 PM
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
10:39 PM
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
10:34 PM
Sunday, July 24
so i spend a nice day at km8. for me at least, it was nice because it reminds me of my beloved thailand, and because it brings back lovely memories of cocktails by the beach. but i guess the rest werent too enamoured with the lack of activities or the absence of the sun, or the music they thought was awful.
sidetracking abit, i think i really have the ability to adapt myself and enjoy myself when i want to. its all in the state of mind. could even be the best bit of me.
now what's a beach outing without plans for future exotic beach holidays? so liz and liwern and i embarked once again on plans for a full moon party. i wanted to go, alone. because firstly, zh does not party. and when he does party with me, we mostly slink to a corner and smoke and..do nothing. it can be fun sometimes when you're tired and you just want to unwind; but at times it sometimes defeats the purpose of being there. why dress up in your clubbing best when you're there to slouch in a comfy corner sofa?
a week ago, i posted a tag on how some guys are wicked fun to be with, and some are just nice and steady to hold on to. well, it is true.
so now he has the great fantastic idea that maybe we've embarked on a serious relationship too soon. could that be true? well, sometimes i feel a pang for what i am missing out on - the high life, the clubbing, the flirting, the free dinners, drinks, rides, parties, flings. and sometimes i wish we werent too boring - something that has become a rather touchy subject of late - and sometimes i envy the flush of excitement, that heady feel.
but of course in the same breath of thought, i never forgot how he wanders through the back lanes of little india with me, eating chapatti, listening to hindi techno. and how he brings me to ballet under the stars, and spends time with me at the beach, just reading magazines on an overcast day.
what is an open relationship? it is rubbish, and im hurt he is even entertaining thoughts of it. it a devilish idea and it should never have made it past his lips. just because i sometimes want to kick my heels up and have a good party, does not mean i am ready to be hedonistic and nonchalant about my relationships.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
1:20 AM
Friday, July 22
she can guess. but she wont know what this is till tomorrow! happy birthday liwern!
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
10:23 PM
welcome back dear camera! liwern and i forgot to take pictures just now, so here's me, my sister and the duck rice welcoming it home with gusto! we love you canon ixus eng!
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
8:56 PM
and thats my mom's famous vegetarian duck rice. apart from her vegetarian chicken rice and nasi lemak and fried rice and lontong and..
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
8:55 PM
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
8:54 PM
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
8:54 PM
finally, deez eez my seezter! she is sewing a portrait of some hoitytoity posh ladaay! after her art&craft teacher has graded it, she promised to let me hang it up in my room!
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
8:01 PM
Wednesday, July 20
im not cut out to be homemaker. ever. when faced with the prospect of having absolutely nothing to do except make my bed, i feel daaaaaamn sian. i take out my immense boredom on everyone and i get frustrated with the world and the boring way im living my life. then after a prolonged period of mooching around, i swing into travel mode. this mode is characterized by much daydreaming, fancy thoughts and exotic locations.
the mother road: route 66.
(inspired by roadtripusa.com and scores of american sex-before-college roadtrip movies)
this legendary old road runs between chicago and los angeles, passing through the heart of the us of a on a diagonal trip that takes in some of the country's most archetypal roadside scenes. displays of neon signs, rusty middle-of-nowhere truck stops, kitschy americana and greasy diners.
but perhaps more compelling, is its time line of contemporary america. nicknamed 'the main street of america', route 66 fashionably wound through small towns across the midwest and southwest, lined by hundreds of cafes, motels, gas stations and tourist attractions at every quarter. during the great depression, a vast number of farm families made their way west along the route to california, following what john steinbeck called 'the mother road' in his writings. later on, thousands more expressed their upward mobility by leaving the industrial east, bound for good jobs in the suburban idyll of southern california; again following route 66, which came to embody the demographic shift from the rust belt to the sun belt.
perfecto. from the golden sands and sunshine of los angeles, past the grand canyon and the desert southwest, to end up on the gritty streets of chicago. i like that. :] ok, am feeling better now. tanning time!
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:44 PM
Tuesday, July 19
a spot of redecorating and curtain fabricating is in order for my new room which is a voyeur's dream.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
11:31 AM
Monday, July 18
attention.
liwern's getting old! this little babe's birthday's on the 22nd. being the sunworshipping lasses we are, we will be at km8 thhis sat :] mostly to soak up some good sun and bask in some fancy female companionship. together, we will sit in a circle and pray that she gets to stay in eusoff with us. lol. so be there.(yes you, jo!) remember folks, you can never be too tanned. haha!
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
9:01 PM
divulging secrets and habits is an act of intimacy. as zh regaled me with stories of how his grandfather would painstakingly hoard plastic bags and fold them up meticulously; as we chuckled together at this cute old man's staggering collection of chicken stock cubes in the refrigerator; as he sneakily pointed out to me the gonggong's stash of junky icecream in the freezer, i suddenly felt connected. and on another previous occasion, my cousin, a newly-made father, spending the entire afternoon recounting his son's various quirks, scandals and escapades, not caring less whether we were interested in how many times his son would fart before sleeping.
only to a loved one, would oddities seem that magnetic. i can hardly wait for the day i have little peewees of my own; and i would duly fall in love with their every dribble and fart.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
6:16 PM
whee. i drove my dad's car yesterday! and i only almost banged 2 cars. and then i drove zh's car at night and only almost knocked down a young angmoh family with the cutest little blond son. and then later at night, my dubious spate of accidents continued with much fanfare as my camera fell from a height at 1.86 metres, gaining momentum with every millisecond and finally crashing right smack onto the ground.
*update: i think its covered under warranty. hurray!
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:23 PM
Sunday, July 17
our third b.u.t.s at fortcanning. i joked that we should become patrons of sdt. this time, they did the little mermaid; only like all other ballets, this one also had to have tragedy in the excesses. firstly the little mermaid did not just lose her voice to ursula - she had her tongue bitten off. secondly, she did not just have to wrench the prince away from his impending nuptials with another woman - she had to kill him with a knife as well, to save herself from dying. but of course she could not bear to kill him, so she did not get to live happily ever after. so she died and faded into the foam of the sea. and then a whole bunch of angels came out and started dancing with her. despite the slightly incredulously ridiculous sounding plot, i had an enjoyable night. :]
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:52 AM
swirls for a new tat. swirls, butterflies & tats. :]
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:27 AM
dumb people queueing for a stupid precious moments mastercard. what the fuck, the card's godamn ugly! not to mention the dolls too.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:26 AM
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:25 AM
being touristy in city hall, of all places.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:19 AM
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:17 AM
wadya know. green and pink is the new black and white.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:11 AM
Saturday, July 16
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
11:56 PM
Friday, July 15
i was all ready to blame the recent series of unfortunate driving tests on my 'unlucky shoes'. the pair of 5-pounds black flats that i got from london. not only does it seem to bring bad luck to my tests, it also continues to bite my feet to this day. haha but my shoes have been spared. i passed, i passed, i passed!!! i was so thrilled that i just wanted to grab my nice tester and hug him. lucky thing i restrained myself and gave him a handshake instead.
on another note, mr nkf quit! haha how fun and his board actually went down the sinking shit, i mean ship, with him. though of course im not going fall over myself bemoaning the heavens that i have been suckered into donating lots of moolah to nkf (because i havent). but lets just hope that ren ci does not fall into the same trap. because i know my mom is very fond of donating to ren ci.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
4:17 PM
Thursday, July 14
some boys are wicked fun to party with; others make sweet stable lovers. you cant have it all.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
4:09 PM
Wednesday, July 13
such a nice hot afternoon and im tanning in the garden with my laptop. there's better wireless in my garden than in my bedroom. what the hell, really. so my brother just had a 'sandwich' consisting of cheese (2 layers) and a hunk of butter (the sandwiched bit). seriously cant stand how he remains prisoner-of-war-thin. sigh. going to ambrosia (yaaay! my fav chillout place :] ) with richard and nerf later for yummy drinks and sheeshah. im hoping that because they have a slight innate gay factor, they would enjoy the ambience a l'il better than most other guys. and then later its off to zouk.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
4:29 PM
Monday, July 11
i like this because the zebra in the middle, is the centre of attraction. ha ha ha :]
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
9:14 AM
Sunday, July 10
my boyfriend talks me out of staring into the mirror and feeling ugly, he cajoles me into joining him for dinner at chat masala, he bravely sacrifices his dwindling funds to order good stuff, remains patient even though i am falling asleep over dinner and then presents me with a gift so momentously meaningful. it feels good to be loved; thankyou sweets.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
4:21 PM
Saturday, July 9
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
5:12 PM
ernest (who looks like nerfy!) me and nicholas.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
5:11 PM
me and ann at gotham.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
5:08 PM
backstage with the girls.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
5:01 PM
with nerfy, otherwise known as mr angmokio. teehee. or you can call him mr newurbanmale.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
4:58 PM
ahi! my babe, chrystal. stole all the guys' hearts, she did.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
4:56 PM
full regalia for war games.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
4:55 PM
look. paul's toe has a funky yin-yang birthmark!
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
4:53 PM
am back from camp. surprisingly the past few days have flown by. maybe because i actually enjoyed myself. starkly opposed to my fervant anti-camp stance before that.
bitching sessions on a scale so frightfully lethal that it almost became a badge of honor, mass strepsils consumption, getting carried off by my freshies into the sea, getting carried off by them into the mud, getting rolled in the mud. but i must also own up to the fact that the reason was not because im a campy person by nature (likes to cheer and play muddy or flour-y games all day long), but rather because i practically designed my own un-campy schedule. in a very obscene display of self-absorption and immaturity, i decided that i would wake up later than everyone else, take part in activities that sounded good to me, bathe earlier than everyone else, plan nights off for myself, scout around for pageant potentials at any time i desired and so forth. im not particularly proud of myself and really the worst sort of councillor.
the thing about camps is that it totally immerses you in it while alienating you from the rest of the world. when i learnt of the london blasts, my reaction was 'ohshit' but i didnt know quite what to make out of it. it was like i have lost touch because i havent been reading the papers. only when i came back and read the papers, did i realise the full scale of terror that had taken place.
but i really enjoyed the company for the past few days. especially a few memorable freshies from ahi, richard for really being my best buddy, glenn for being so hilariously queer when tipsy, barry for being the residential water hydrant, denise for being the cutest slk. and then nerfy for doing his watsonics by choreographing the camp pageant segments for us.
camp pageant. im proud of the boys and girls for just doing it up there even though we grabbed them like 15 minutes before their segment and basically cowed them into blindly following the sequences. :] i can imagine jamnhop and unionball would be infinitely more rewarding.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
4:26 PM
Wednesday, July 6
camps are just so odd. throw a bunch of 24 greenhorns together, make them look for clues and stuff their faces in flour, and they instantly bond.
the original plan was for 14 of us councillors to squeeze in the 4 double rooms. but after a sneaky rearrangement of rooms, we managed to each hoard a room zealously for ourselves. so the final arrangement sidelined the freshies by requiring most of them to squeeze in the double rooms instead, and just a lucky few in the single rooms. and what happens? they ALL want to bunk in together. so we have 2 girls sharing a tiny single room, 4 guys sharing a double rooms. and the best part, single rooms being left empty.
haha. to round things up, it is imperative to throw in a couple of marginally goodlooking people and witness the group morale automatically creep up a notch. watch the goodlookers flock together and indulge in 'goodlooker' activities like eating supper and watching videos, and one cannot help but launch into an introspective psychoanalysis of the new freshies.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
2:05 AM
Tuesday, July 5
haha im at union camp now. (yes, i brought my laptop!) i came in with a i-want-to-zhao-asap-and-as-much-as-i-can attitude. turns out that my friends have sentiments along the same line. this should be fun lol.
we're awaiting freshies now, and hoping they wont be too ugly. isnt life horrible? it treats you in accordance to how you look.
its nice to be back in eusoff. but i'd forgotten how hot it can get in here. next semester, zh and i are investing in a heavy duty giant fan.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:59 AM
Sunday, July 3
today we had a sermon on john 2:1-11. giving our best to god just like how he gave the finest wine at cana. so the preacher wrapped it up by saying we should always give the lord our choiciest offerings. so as he was saying that final bit, he subconsciously dug his hands into his pocket and made a giving money gesture. teehee. to give our best during offeratory!
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
5:33 PM
so i was watching zh breeze through the slides, feeling an almost maternal sort of glow. but i guess it cannot be compared to the
real maternal glow radiating from
his mother sitting beside me. hm. hah. we basically sat there, eyes glued on zh and prayerfully ignoring the other.
im so proud of him.
even though he made a very beautiful pronunciation error that will probably form the core of all jokes for the next week or so.
but im seriously aghast at his team members. for a national competition , they have major commitment issues. out of 4 members, only 2 turned up. and today was the judging session! unbelievably enough, one of them was busy burying yet another member of his vast and varied collection of close family friends and the other was erm, feverish. what the hell.
that makes me even more doubly proud of him for just dealing with it. and delivering the presentation himself. very good job, baby.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:02 AM
Friday, July 1
thanks cheryl. you're welcome to the imaginary air kissing and occasional bitching too. now if only the world of gucci and prada will welcome me too! :]
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
10:40 PM
everytime i get a phonecall from 'anonymous', my heart beats a little faster. because it is my sri lankan pseudo lover calling me. right. rishan calls me an average of 10 times a day, and messages me another 15 times a day. the strange thing is that the same message will arrive 3 times. probably a bizarre characteristic of sri lankan smses.
it was sorta cute at first. for example, 'Amandailakeyourishan' - which translates into 'amanda i like you. rishan.'
then it started to sound a little weird. 'AMANDAOLLTHEBEST YOUWORNDICECREAMCALL THE RISHANPLEES' - which translates into 'amanda all the best. you want icecream call the rishan please.'
and later, downright irritating. 'Amandacomebacksrilankamyhardbrocken rishan'. do i have to translate that?
seems like sri lankan handphones have sporadic space keys too. sighsigh. i am being advised by aziz to send rishan an email politely informing him that i'd gotten married to my 'chinese no good' chinese bf due to a sudden shift in constellations or something like that.
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
10:13 PM
it was a peachy day after all. zh and i took a bus down to bugis to meet junie so i could settle the accounts. and along the way, we somehow took in singapore from an entirely different perspective. i saw victoria street with lonelyplanet-esque eyes. i desperately wanted to wildly point my camera at gorgeous shophouses and madly shoot away. i loved the mosque on jalan sultan; digged that funky little red and green temple near lavender. it was like falling in love with your own little island after so many months being away. absence makes the heart. yep, grow fonder.
and then later on i met cheryl for mexican food at holland v. and its always amazing how much i have to tell her each and every time i meet her. it just flows and i readily dig out stories of how the little orphans would cut themselves with nails at the worksite just to get some tender loving care from our first-aiders. stories like these that i wouldnt ordinarily remember. we just really cant blog our whole lives down. we need intimate contact for little stories to flow.
and halfway through the night, it dawned upon me that i dont talk about felix anymore. its like ive exhausted all the memories we've had and now the dilemma of dichotomizing my past and present no longer even exists. now i just look ahead and categorize my present
with my future.
i thank god for the past few days of good food and sense of wellbeing. by the way, tazo chai frap at starbucks is really really nice.
goodnight everyone :]
Swirls and whirls
and butterflies.
12:18 AM
